The George Lucas Talk Show - Season 1
Season 1
Episodes
Episode I: Digital Magic
Episode II: Radioland Stream Night
Episode III: Askew of the Views
THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW Episode III ASKEW OF THE VIEWS Snoochie Boochies. The George Lucas Talk Show, for 6 long years the slightest of cult comedy sensations at NEW YORK CITY'S UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE, has, in 2020, suddenly finds itself without a home due to a DEADLY PANDEMIC. Wear a mask. Separated by thousands of miles, retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his loyal talk show sidekick, WATTO (GRIFFIN NEWMAN, from Amazon's undermerchandized series, THE TICK), joined by their snack-obsessed, nap-loving producer PATRICK COTNOIR, have now officially re-launched their show from the self-quarantined, socially distant, fully digital safety of the PLANET SCUM channel on TWITCH. Aided at times by the public domain music of VLAD GLUSCHENKO (though the original theme music you are hearing right now is by RYAN MILLER from GUSTER) and a smattering of surprise visits from various FRIENDS, George And Watto seek to reinvent the talk show with a bold new format in which their shortest episodes have been at least 60 seconds longer than MARTIN SCORSESE'S THE IRISHMAN...will tonight be any different? Find out tonight, on THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW. - THIS WEEK'S GUEST KEVIN SMITH #Clerkskywalker #Mallwomprats #THX113Amy #Dogmandalorian #ReyAndSilentBb8StrikeBack #JynErsoGirl #ClerksIID2 #HanAndChewieMakeAPorno #CoptainEOut #RedStateTails #TuskanRaiders #YodaHosers #ReyAndSilentBb8REBOot #SnoochieBabuchies.
Episode IV: A New Coping Mechanism
Re-opening the schools before it is safe is a BAD IDEA! Meanwhile, THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW continues to thrives in its new socially distant, fully digital format on PLANET SCUM! After more than half a decade producing a live, in-person cult comedy show at NEW YORK CITY'S UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE, retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his loyal talk show sidekick WATTO (loveable co-lead on Amazon's THE TICK) are now separated by thousands of miles thanks to a DEADLY PANDEMIC. Wear a mask! They are joined by their nap-obsessed, snack-eating, sausage-freezing producer PATRICK COTNOIR, who needs you and all your friends to follow him on twitter: @patrickcotnoir Also, please go to IMDb and rate/review this show! Maybe sometimes click on our names or search for us. We think maybe it will help with our IMDb Pro Starmeter rankings....
Episode V: The Empire Strikes Duck
Episode VI: Revenge of the Return of the Jedi
Episode VII: Streamers of the Lost Art (of Conversation)
POSTMASTER GENERAL LOUIS DeJOY SHOULD BE IN PRISON! THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW has now existed as a digital livestream on PLANET SCUM for almost four full months and more than 127 HOURS of streamcasting. Hailed by THE NEW YORK TIMES as "costume friendly," the in-person version of this show ran at NEW YORK CITY'S UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE for 6 years, until retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his loyal talk show sidekick WATTO (GRIFFIN NEWMAN, loveable co-lead on Amazon's THE TICK) were suddenly separated by thousands of miles thanks to a DEADLY PANDEMIC that is going to be with us for a while thanks to the 40% of the population that can't follow simple instructions to WEAR A MASK. They are joined by their nap snacking, sausage freezing producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka PAT THE RAT aka PATATOUILLE) who is begging you to follow him on twitter: @patrickcotnoir Please visit our IMDb page to help us maintain a decent STARmeter ranking, and don't forget to rate and review us....
Episode VIII: THX-113GREAT
STRANGE MAGIC is on DISNEY+ again! Meanwhile, THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW is still being discovered by literally dozens of new viewers every Sunday here on PLANET SCUM. After years of live comedy shows at NEW YORK CITY'S UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE, retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his loyal talk show sidekick WATTO (GRIFFIN NEWMAN, loveable co-lead on Amazon's THE TICK) were suddenly separated by thousands of miles thanks to a DEADLY PANDEMIC that is not going anywhere soon, folks. WEAR A MASK! They are joined by their snack-napping, druther-hoarding producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka PAT THE RAT aka PATATOUILLE) whose druthers include you following him on twitter RIGHT NOW: @patrickcotnoir Please visit our IMDb page to help us maintain a decent STARmeter ranking, and don't forget to rate and review us....
Episode IX: Yoda Hosers
Episode X: SithTrax
The pandemic continues! Meanwhile, THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW is still safely livestreaming every Sunday on PLANET SCUM. After many years of in-person shows at NEW YORK CITY'S UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE, retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his loyal talk show sidekick WATTO (GRIFFIN NEWMAN, loveable co-lead on Amazon's THE TICK) are doing their best to keep doing shows despite being separated by thousands of miles. It is exhausting. It is going to be at least a year before things can even be anywhere close to normal. Please wear a mask. They are joined by a messy bitch who lives for the drama and is trying to get fired, producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka PAT THE RAT aka PATATOUILLE aka QUACKTRICK LUCKDUCK aka PIGTRICK OINKOINK) whose druthers include you following him on twitter RIGHT NOW: @patrickcotnoir Please visit our IMDb page to help us maintain a decent STARmeter ranking, and don't forget to rate and review us....
Episode XI: Best in Show
The president is SICK! As if that wasn't bad enough, he now also has COVID-19 and most likely infected a bunch of other people. Meanwhile, THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW continues to offer you hours of weekly content safely livestreamed to your household devices every Sunday via the magic of PLANET SCUM. Unlike THE COMMISSION ON PRESIDENTIAL DEBATES, we have safety rules and they actually mean something. We don't just allow a bunch of infected people to wander into our show at the last minute spreading their disease. After years of in-person shows at NEW YORK CITY'S UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE, retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his loyal talk show sidekick WATTO (GRIFFIN NEWMAN, loveable co-lead on Amazon's THE TICK) now do livestreams every week. It'll be a long time before it is safe to consider going back to the old way of doing things. Please wear a mask. And if someone makes fun of your mask for being "too big" or something, bear in mind that that person might be in the hospital breathing from an oxygen tank within 72 hours. Someone who always responsibly wears a mask (in addition to his big beard) producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka PAT THE RAT aka PATATOUILLE aka QUACKTRICK LUCKDUCK aka PIGTRICK OINKOINK aka RANGETRICK ACTSMORE aka PASSWORD DOXXNOIR) is here to keep the show running smoothly in quarantine, and his druthers include you following him on twitter RIGHT NOW: @patrickcotnoir In other news, our show has now fallen out of the IMDb Top 40,000 and we would like to be in the Top 20,000. Everybody please email two friends and send them to our IMDb page to rate and review us (or even to just click on the page and see if that helps us?) Ok, that's enough of the crawl text. Does anyone even read these anymore? Let's get this show started....
Episode XII: The Empire Contracts Covid
The President is spreading a disease! Meanwhile, THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW continues to provide hours of responsible, law-abiding content safely livestreamed every Sunday on PLANET SCUM. It is possible to do stuff without actively making people sick. You just have to give a shit about other people, that's all. Following many years of live shows at NEW YORK CITY'S UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE, retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his loyal talk show sidekick WATTO (GRIFFIN NEWMAN, loveable co-lead on Amazon's THE TICK) now do it all from the relative isolation of Skywalker Ranch and The Dakota Building, using DIGITAL MAGIC. They are joined by a messy bitch who lives for the drama and is trying to get fired, producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka PAT THE RAT aka PATATOUILLE aka QUACKTRICK LUCKDUCK aka PIGTRICK OINKOINK aka RANGETRICK ACTSMORE aka PASSWORD DOXXNOIR) whose druthers include you following him on twitter RIGHT NOW: @patrickcotnoir Hey, remember last week when [REDACTED]?
Episode XIII: Revenge of the Sick
THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW used to be a live, in-person show for audiences at the UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE in NEW YORK CITY but now things like that are impossible to do safely so they do weekly livestreams every Sunday on PLANET SCUM. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his loyal talk show sidekick WATTO (GRIFFIN NEWMAN, lovable co-lead on Amazon's THE TICK) now broadcast from the relative isolation of Skywalker Ranch and The Dakota Building, using DIGITAL MAGIC. They are joined by a MBWL4TD (messy bitch who lives for the drama) and is T2GF (trying to get fired), producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka PAT THE RAT aka PAT-A-TAT-TAT aka PATSY CLINE ok I am just making up new ones on the spot now) whose druthers include you following him on twitter RIGHT NOW: @patrickcotnoir Please vote for JOE BIDEN....
Episode XIV: Halloweekend Spooktacular: Covid-1138: More American Willoweenie: The Battle for Elector
BOO! Halloween was yesterday but guess what? Everything is still terrifying. THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW used to be a live event at the UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE in NEW YORK CITY but then the pandemic hit and the only safe way to do it now is as a livestream here on PLANET SCUM. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his loyal talk show sidekick WATTO (GRIFFIN NEWMAN, loveable co-lead on Amazon's THE TICK) are joined by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka DA PADUSA aka ROSEMARY IN HER GARDEN aka NAPPY SNACKY) and his druthers include you following him on twitter RIGHT NOW: @patrickcotnoir To quote PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA, "Don't boo, vote." As in, VOTE FOR JOE BIDEN....
Episode XV: A New Hopevember
YIPEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW started out as a live show at the UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE in NEW YORK CITY but then a fucking moron became president and long story short we now have to do these things as livestreams on PLANET SCUM. That's one of the reasons he lost the election this week. But I guess a lot of people must really like all this death and chaos because he still got 70 million votes. Every Sunday now, retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his loyal talk show sidekick WATTO (GRIFFIN NEWMAN, loveable co-lead on Amazon's THE TICK) are joined by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka Polltrick Votemore aka Lipstick Smoochmore aka Four Seasons Landscaping) and his druthers include you following him on twitter RIGHT NOW: @patrickcotnoir YUB NUB!
Episode XVI: The Search for Watto
Watto has vanished. In his absence, THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW must continue, just as it did after the closure of the UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE in NEW YORK CITY. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) has been left to helm the show with only his snack-obsessed, nap-loving producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka Crystal Patrick) whose druthers include you following him on twitter RIGHT NOW: @patrickcotnoir. This is crazy, kids. Come observe now, for letting it continue, thusly...
Episode XVII: The Hey Nong Mandalorian
WATTO is back! Yippee! And THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW continues to deliver quality livestream content from the digital safety of PLANET SCUM, now that the UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE in NEW YORK CITY has been shut down due to a RAGING PANDEMIC. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and the aforementioned WATTO (GRIFFIN NEWMAN, co-lead on Amazon's THE TICK) encourage everybody to stay safe this week. You can maybe have an up-close Thanksgiving next year, but for this one you should focus on not spreading the disease around, ok? They are joined, as always, by snack-snacking, nap-napping producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka MC Skratch Kat aka Nametrick Dropmore aka Thanktrick Givenoir) whose druthers include you following him on twitter RIGHT NOW: @patrickcotnoir
Episode XVIII: DECEMBYRINTH
As the death toll rises, THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW continues to deliver quality livestream content from the digital safety of PLANET SCUM. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his CGI co-host WATTO (GRIFFIN NEWMAN, co-lead on Amazon's THE TICK) welcome guests and have fun while actively NOT spreading a disease. They are joined, as always, by snack-snacking, nap-napping producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka Nickname Jokenoir) whose druthers include you following him on twitter RIGHT NOW: @patrickcotnoir Only a few weeks left in 2020. Who knows what fresh hell awaits us in 2021? Dot dot dot dot..
Episode XIX: Investors Meeting
The pandemic rages on. Meanwhile, THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW continues to deliver quality livestream content from the digital safety of PLANET SCUM. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (notoriously dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and the aforementioned WATTO (GRIFFIN NEWMAN, co-lead on Amazon's THE TICK) provide weekly entertainment which can be viewed safely by people who don't want to catch a disease. Do YOU want to catch a disease? No? Good. That was the right answer. They are joined, as always, by snack-snacking, nap-napping producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka Bumptrick Guestgone aka Bootrick Scootmore aka Bootscoot Baby) whose druthers include you following him on twitter RIGHT NOW: @patrickcotnoir Hey, next week is our HOLIDAY SPECIAL. Ooh, tell your friends about it. Especially if your friends are rich and want to help us help people who are hungry and need food. I'm serious, if you have rich friends, send them our way next week for our last charity fundraiser of this horrible, horrible year..
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